I suppopse if I had to describe my spirituality I would say that I wrestle with God, always have, always will. I like the story of Jacob wrestling with God. I suppose I can relate. I read this scripture this moring...
Ephesians 6:12
12For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
I suppose God's not the only thing we wrestle with. Through my journey I have come to my own understanding (or lack of understanding) about spiritual battles. Sometimes, while I'm here in
13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.
19Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, 20for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.
5 comments:
Youve mentioned this afew times now.. the spiritual climate in Melbourne.. Its interesting.
you also make a good point about wrestling being about getting up each day. There comes a time ( not sure if I am there yet) when everything is stripped back to a choice of whether you will go on living and struggle on, or give up life, physically, or just internally. Each moment of each day can feel like a choice between these two things.
There have been forces of death at work in my life... I have been depressed for most of my life i think. i include all of my childhood and adolescence in this.
How far does GOds love really reach?
Song of solomon says that love is stronger than death.. sometimes this feels like a pipe dream.
I like the story of jacob to.
Jacob wresteled the angel
and the angel was overcome
U2 - bullet the blue sky
I feel the same. It's a never ending battle... and I can't remember when it began, so it's kinda always been. (Laura don't read this it will freak you out) when I was a child I was plagued with nightmares... everynight... it was terrible... I would beg God to take them away. He never did. Eventually when I would pray I would hear someone tell me that if I stopped praying he would take my nightmares away. Luckly I was more afraid of God than my enemy. So I never stopped praying. I've always felt like from a very early age my enemy has set out to control me with fear. I was consumed with fear by the time I met John... what a couple huh? the fearless and the most fearfull. I'm happy to talk about this in depth with you, but maybe not on here cause it will freak my sister out :)
I thought you were ignoring me for being selfish... you may have heard that i have been a little ticked off of late...this response is really interesting.
I was going to post an update here but wouldnt util you responded. It was a while back now, so the details are gettin a little fuzzy.. it was either the night after, or before I read this post, I was feeling really freaked out for some reason, and I started praying.. even though i felt( like i always do) that God had had enough of my selfishness and wouldnt listen.
I heard this voice in my mind saying really strongly... your prayers are no good to you... I prayed any way..hoping against hope as usual
I think it was the next morning I read your post, and was inspired to read that passage of scripture.. I really felt strengthened by it ( for that day anyway)
whether or not this was grace at work, who knows.. but it seemed like one of those coincidenceless coincidences..
I also had heaps of fear of spiritual forces when I was a little kid.. coz of the stuff my mum dabbled in.. it kept me awake at night
Sorry it took so long... it had nothing to do with you... it's kind of freaky when I think about it. I was so excited to read your comment, and thought of heaps to write back, but then decided to think about what I would put on here, or if I would just send you a private email. Then, like so many times right now, I'm lead to distraction. I'm living in a state right now of feeling like I'm missing/forgeting something. Concentrating is really hard. My mind is all over the place. I get dizzy a lot and feel a bit disorentated. Please be patient with me as I wade through wet cement to get to you :)
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